"I was flipping through Louis Gosset Jr.’s autobiography and happened to spot a picture of him sitting in front of a table covered with trophies. Underneath it was a caption in which Gosset stated that when he feels under-appreciated he has to go look at his acting awards. So I guess when he’s feeling too good about himself he has to go watch “Jaws 3”?"
"Cartoon fans were outraged this afternoon when James Cameron announced a plan to name his BP oil spill cleanup team “The Last Airbender”."
"Forget the Greek, let’s get Russell Brand a one-way airline ticket back to the UK!"
"Tom Selleck wants to re-team with Ted Danson and Steve Guttenberg for a sequel to “Three Men And A Little Lady”. I would rather see them re-team for a sequel to “The Human Centipede”."
"Do you know what I think would be cooler than a mechanical bull? A mechanical piñata! Whoever rides it hard enough to break it wins all the candy and prizes that spill out onto the padded floor."
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